travellin' man day 1

2006.01.15
I'm in Dallas for work this week...can't guarantee what my online access will be, and don't actually have time to do a full "backlog flush" so bear with me as I try to cobble up something interesting for these days...

How misguided is it that one of the big things attracting me to a job with travel, besides scouting out various regions, and having the experience of more client-facing work, is that I think I might get in some solid extra time to read? I just assembled a "remember to pack this list" on my Palm and while "swimming suit", "GPS" and even "laptop" had question marks after them, "books" did not.

And by the way: Merry Christmas, Broncos. Pats, five turnovers do not a returning champion make.


Music of the Moment
So years I got this CD Cra-a-zy Hits, a collection of 60s novelty songs. I think I wanted "Wipeout" for our new CD player, but far and away my favorite song on it now is Pigmeat Markham's "Here Comes The Judge"...

It's a very odd song. For one thing, it has a terrific funk groove that sill sounds good these days. But beyond that..it predates the mainstream appearance of Rap by like two decades but still has the exact cadence of early Hip Hop. And the whole thing carries an anti-Vietnam message, to go along side the bragadoccio, now-racist-sounding black types and corny knock-knock jokes....that Amazon link has a clip from it, it's worth checking out. But here's a big chunk of the lyrics:
Hear ye, hear ye!
This court is now in session!
His Honor, Judge Pigmeat Markham presidin'

Hear ye, hear ye, the court of swing
It's just about ready to do that thing
I don't want no tears, I don't want no lies
Above all, I don't want no alibis!
This Judge is hip, and that ain't all,
He'll give you time if you're big or small
All in line for this court is neat...Peace brother,

Here comes the Judge! Here comes the Judge!
Everybody knows that he is the judge!


Everybody near or far!
I'm goin' to Paris to stop this war!
All those kids gotta listen to me,
Because I am the judge and you can plainly see
I wanna big 'round table when I get there.
I won't sit down to one that's square
I wanna lay down the law, it better not budge,
I'll bust some head because I am the judge!

Here comes the Judge! Here comes the Judge!
Everybody knows that he is the judge!


[then the song breaks for some knock knock jokes...]

*knock knock* Judge: "Who's there?"
Guy: "Eyes"
Judge: "Eyes who?"
Guy:"Eyes yo' next door neighbor!
[wild laughter]
Judge: "Order in this courtroom! Order in this courtroom!"
Gal: "Judge, your Honorship, High sir...Did I hear you say order in the court?"
Judge: "Yes...I said order!"
Gal: "Well, I'll take two cans of beer, please."

He is the judge, he is the judge!
Everybody knows that he is the judge!

So final bit of Kirk trivia: Pigmeat Markham is probably most well known for the "Judge" routine on "Laugh-In", along with his catch phrase "You can look that up in your Funk and Wagnalls."...and my family had a set of Funk and Wagalls encyclopedias when I was growing up, so I will always have a soft place in my heart for that line...